nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
