i barfeds in our rink
love makes seman taste better
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
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