I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
ttyl tear gas
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
