She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
