They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize