i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
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