thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
And then my night got REAL pukey
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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