i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
