So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
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