Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
