just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Randomize
