Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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