he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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