garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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