Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
