Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I queefed so loud it echoed.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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