I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize