I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize