If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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