paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
My liver just had a heart attack.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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