So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
