The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
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