Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
