New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
