i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
