question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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