what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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