At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
Randomize
