She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Randomize
