It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
I want you more than these girls want KFC
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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