another moral hangover. fuck.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize
