Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
