I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
