After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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