PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
