Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Randomize