Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
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