is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
