We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID