Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
