Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I believe in your delicious
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
