At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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