Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
