Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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