So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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