of course. lets lasso hookers.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
