Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
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I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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