chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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