tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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