Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
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