Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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